Month: February 2016

Thirty five years ago God in His infinite wisdom thought about me, and knitted together the love of my life Jaymie Pottinger. God blessed the womb of my mother-in-law when He created a first-rate man for me. Although not perfect, he is best suited for me. The journey of our marriage has been paved with bumps, curves, plateaus, valleys and mountains. It has been a kaleidoscope of refining, imperfect, maddening, joyous, agonizing and elating experiences that I would not trade for the world.  This very limited medium will not afford me the opportunity to share all the wonderful and amazing things that I love about you, and so I chose 10.

Ten Things I Love About You

1. I Love Every Single Inch of your Anatomy. “His hands are rods of gold set with beryl; his abdomen is carved ivory inlaid with sapphires, his legs are pillars of alabaster set in pedestals of pure gold.”(Song of Solomon 5:14-15). When I first read this particular passage, I wondered whether or not the Queen of Sheba had ever seen you the way I have. These very words echo the sentiments that only I can know whenever granted the coveted opportunity of beholding all of you. Sometimes pinching myself is not enough to remind me that you are mine. My eyes feast on you, and your delicacies are meant for me only. You, undeniably satisfy me in every way conceivable. I am completely and utterly smitten by you.
2. I Love the Way You Dress. Your sense of fashion and style is impeccable. Fitted shirts, fitted suits, skinny ties and wing-tipped shoes look great only because they are on you. Compliments on your attire are constantly received, but your desire is in ensuring that your number one admirer’s expectations are met- and trust me the expectations have been exceeded! You keep things fresh, and keep me guessing and I am proud to be the woman by your side.
3. I Love the Way you Walk. With each step you take, the clear message sent is “I am a man on a mission”. Your walk epitomizes confidence, agility, passion and purpose. Speed and precision accompany all your tasks. You are intentional about everything you do and possess the skills, and the confidence in getting the job done. Your heart beats at the center of all that you do and I am proud to watch you succeed again and again.  Daily driven by a higher purpose, you are walking along the path of a purpose driven life.
4. I Love that you are such an Exceptional Father to our Girls. The fact that our girls are growing into confident, self-assured and brilliant young ladies is simply because of the love that you constantly pour into them. Every single day, they are reminded that they are loved, cherished and honored through a hug, a reassuring word, a reprimand or a gentle kiss. The various roles you play as father, playmate and disciplinarian impact our girls in a tremendous way and sometimes I just sit back and stare. My own childhood would have been sweeter if I was blessed with a dad like you.
5. I Love the way you are Protective of ALL the Ladies in your Life. You are like a tamed tiger, my tamed tiger- except when you sense danger. You have never left anyone in your care vulnerable to the attacks of anyone or anything whether it be your mother, sisters, our girls and most definitely not me! You’ll stop at nothing to ensure that we are protected in and out of your presence and it has not gone unnoticed. Thank you for protecting me, my body, my soul and my reputation. I love you for it!
6. I Love that you are always Honest with me. It seems as though you are never afraid to tell me as it is, even if this involves sharing harsh details. This brutal honesty has by all means helped to refine me in so many ways. I am on my way to becoming the very best version of me that I could possibly be thanks to you. Love for me motivates you in this regard and I am all the better for it.
7. I Love Being Loved by You. You have the most amazing and unique way of making me feel like I am the most gorgeous, sexy and brilliant woman in the whole wide world. In a crowded room; your eyes always find me. I know that I am never alone. Feeling the warmth of your admiration and attraction even from a great distance has now become my solace. You communicate to me on a higher stratosphere and we share a conversation without words. When you do speak your words claim me, you know me, and you’ve read me. You know the right words that stimulate a physiological response. At times I wonder if my arousal is on speed dial with you! You are the key to my heart.
8. I Love the Way you Speak. Speaking looks so easy with you. Whether you are addressing a large group of people, or you are simply having a conversation with me, words flow from your lips with such ease. You are sophisticated, eloquent, highly intelligent and never lacking common sense. Many people stand in awe of you. You speak words of wisdom in ways many have never heard, and they flock to you desiring to gain some morsel from your lips. The youths love and respect you and you never cease to amaze me with your linguistic prowess.
9. I Love your love and Commitment to ALL People. This very important Christian principle seeps out of you. Your love for all people has dissolved the barriers of culture, religion, age, race or economic status. You cannot be placed in box as your love is transcendent in nature. I recall my very first visit to your community when I was completely blown away by level of respect and admiration garnered as a youth. Both the young and the old loved you, even little babies adored you. I surmised that it was because you valued relationships, even though it came at a cost of being vulnerable. Out of all the things I love about you, this is the one I cherish the most.
10. Finally the Thing I Love Most about you is that you are Passionate about your Faith. It truly has been a joy to watch you grow spiritually over the past eleven (11) years. Your love for God has only deepened with time. I am not one to speak on God’s behalf but I’m sure that He is pleased with you. I am certain that if you continue on this journey with Him, the possibilities are endless and I will be honored to be the one by your side.

I could pride myself in a plethora of achievements. Against all the obstacles present in my life, I can chronicle my success in many areas.  But as far as my mortal eyes have been able to behold, my greatest achievement to date was marrying you, Jaymie Pottinger. I am determined by God’s grace to spend the rest of my life Cherishing the Journey…our journey. And one day when our life has reached its sunset I will look back and say that “this life, our life together” has been my number one achievement.

Anyone who knows me well knows that I am a lover of nice heels. When coming up with the name of this blog, the reaction I got was “I get it…that’s so you”. For me, a lady having a pair of red bottoms in the closet is akin to having a PhD in the field of ‘Shoeology’ and the statement it makes is “Yes, I have arrived” (without actually saying it).  It’s amazing how we females can communicate our approval without saying a word, and I have been on the doting end of the equation when it comes to “red bottoms”. Consequently, owning a pair of red bottoms has remained a permanent fixture on my wish list. In my daydreams I imagine my very rich great paternal grandfather shows up and bestows me a pair. Laugh if you may, but my current reality does not permit me acquiring a pair of shoes that could cost anywhere from $500 to $6,000 (US). So I’ll just dream on…..

Then it happened in late November while going through the newsfeed on my social media account. I froze. I saw an ad that immediately captivated my attention. Christian Louboutin was having a 90% off sale on shoes. Shoes that were usually going for $675 were now going for a fraction of that price. I was mesmerized. Red. Bottom. Shoes. I blurted it out as a staccato phrase. My interest was more than piqued, it was arrested.

My curiosity once indulged became “I just have to have one.” The excitement had me giggling like a school girl but before whipping out the credit card my conscience was awakened. There was only one hurdle in my way, my husband. We had agreed that any frivolous spending over $100 would call for the approval of the other spouse. A phone call wouldn’t do, he needed to enjoy a good home cooked meal, have a casual conversation, and then I’d tell him. The evening went as planned and after a very brief discussion  while he was very much distracted, I spilled it. I assumed he gave his consent when he did not oppose but simply gave an “I don’t think my permission even matters” response, then immediately went online and made the purchase. All blinders were on at the time.  It felt so good while I was making the purchase, it was an unnatural high; but,  as soon as I completed my purchase it suddenly hit me, “are these authentic brands?” It was my gut instinct kicking in.

It did not take very long to figure out that the shoes were counterfeits “How could they?” I made several attempts to have my order cancelled so that I could recoup the funds that I had spent, all without success. Foolish was the feeling I felt for not doing a better job at researching that this “counterfeit” website was not a genuine distributer of the brand. I felt like a number, just another victim of their deception and it hurt. I was really disappointed that I fell for it.  I knew better; nevertheless, I was tricked.

As I reflect on that experience, I thought about the encounter between Eve and the serpent. God told Eve what His expectations were. He told her that if she ate from a certain tree, she would die. The Devil simply packaged the lie and sold it to Eve and she bought it. I’ve come to realize that deception is one of the strongest tools that the enemy uses to defeat us in the Christian warfare. He sold her the benefits of her disobedience without disclosing the consequences or revealing the fine prints. He left out “thus saith the Lord” and that’s the part that mattered most.

How many times have we been made victims? The enemy tells us that we can embezzle company resources and not get caught; he shows us the nice car, the expensive clothing and all the good stuff; however, he doesn’t present the whole picture. He does not show us the time spent in jail along with the stress and embarrassment that it causes family. He shows us how we should ditch our lifeless marriage and find passion in a steamy affair; but, he does not show the widespread devastation it unleashes in every aspect of our lives. He shows us the satisfaction while concealing the deception.

Deception by the enemy is real. Instant gratification will always appear to be more alluring and attractive. But how do we win the victory over deception? How do we obtain the tools that will help us detect truth from error? We have to spend time learning about God’s Word. We have to sit at Jesus feet like Mary and learn of Him.

In Mark 13:21 Jesus cautions His disciples to beware of the pervasiveness of deception in the time of the end. Discerning error means that one must know truth. You must have a clear understanding of “thus saith the Lord.” One of the issues with my experience is that I was ignorant of the authentic distributors of Christian Louboutin. I did not spend adequate time researching the brand; hence, I failed in dustinguishing the counterfeit. Consequently, I am now on the email list of the authentic Christian Louboutin website, I’m keeping up to date.  Similarly, in John 15:5 Jesus also says of himself “I am the vine, and you are the branches.” It is not enough to know, we must be kept up to date, day by day abiding in his presence, studying the word and pleading for the Holy Spirit.

A relationship with God involves time. Set apart time to read His word to understand His nature, His standards, and His rules. It’s not a once and for all relationship and it calls for a daily sacrifice. Each day He gives us manna, the manna of discernment to uncover the deception of what we are being sold by the devil. Has God had an opportunity to download a message in your mailbox today?